Jokes Bucket

A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife
and
mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the
Mrs awoke to
find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she
insisted on them both
trying to find her mother. The hunter picked up
his rifle, took a swig
of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a
clearing not far from the
camp, they came upon a hilling sight: the
mother-in-law was backed up
against a thick, impenetrable bush, and
a large male lion stood facing
her. The wife cried, “What are we
going to do?” “Nothing,” said the
hunter husband. “The lion got
himself into this mess, let him get
himself out of it.”

Two
guys were out hunting, but they
weren’t getting any ducks.
“What do you think the problem is?” one man
asked his companion.
“I dunno,” came the reply, “Maybe we aren’t
throwing the dog up
high
enough.”

Some men go on a hunting
trip and separate
into pairs. That
evening one hunter, Sam, returned to camp alone
toting a 12
point buck. “Where’s George?” one of the men asked,
noticing
that Sam had returned alone.

“He’s about 6 miles back.
He tripped and broke his ankle. I left
him there ’cause I figured
ain’t nobody ’bout to steal him.”

Two Canadian hunters were driving through the

country to go bear hunting. They came upon a fork in the road where
a
sign read “BEAR LEFT” so they went home.

A couple of hunters from Prague are out
hunting, and an emormous
bear runs up and in a single gulp devours one of
the hunters.
Miraculously, the swallowed hunter remained alive,
trapped in the belly of the
grizzly.
The other hunter runs back to
town and organizes a rescue party which
heads back to the woods
armed with torches, guns, spears, etc.

Soon they spot two bears on
the horizon and everybody starts shooting
at the bear that’s
closest to them.

“No, not that one,” shouts the surviving hunter,
“That’s the
female.”

“The Czech is in the male.”

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